Tonight, I watched a beautiful clip about beauty and how women view themselves. I grew up in a homeschooling family so I did not have the chance to compare myself to other girls in school, but I still thought I had it bad. There are so many opportunities for young girls to compare yourselves to those around you. Their lives become centered on the stars of the media. The so-called “beautiful people”.
Even though I was not in a social situation each day during my early teens, hormones and adolescence hit me hard as it does most. I started skipping meals and took out sugar and carbs out of my diet as a start. Thinking that this would make me “pretty”, I was excited for the day when I would look like those models we see in the magazines. The day never came, and I was left disappointed and in my mind’s eye, still plump.
The thought of food and eating inhabited every part of my brain. I would do calorie calculations in my head every time I took a bite out of something. It engulfed my life and sucked out the enjoyment in every day. I obviously was not on a good mental path and it would have become serious before long.
I can not remember exactly what changed me, but it felt like I healed myself. I realized that I did not want to be hostage to all of these negative thoughts- and I made an effort to think positively. When you are kind to yourself, and start to love who you are, you slowly begin to accept your flaws. That is when the metamorphosis begins. It takes time, but with time, you start to forget the shell that you were trapped in.
It is a great feeling when you are no longer have the mental shackles that tell you that you are not good enough. That you are not pretty enough.
You can always try to be the best you, but it will not make you happy. You cannot eat beauty. You can not rely on how you look to sustain you. How grateful you are is what will make the difference. If you continue to think positive thoughts, the flower inside of you cannot help but to grow.